February 20, 2000 Mixim Update

This is not a proper or artistic digest. Be forewarned. This is just me
on Sunday night with not much else to do. this is life. There is no
dedication. There will be no poetry. At least none is intended. You be
the judge. This is Sunday night. This is life.

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I am still learning about ice. I have had a couple of run ins with the
glacier on my roof. I reported earlier about just shoveling snow. Later
I learned that the ice actually had to be actively removed. I found the
ax to be a proper weapon against a glacier.  Last week I stood on the
snow piles and crushed the ice as far up the roof as I could reach. I
didn't want to go on the roof. I recognized some danger in swinging and
ax to crush ice under your feet on a steep metal roof. I had hoped by
removing the lower part of the glacier the upper reaches would slide
down and into reach. It did not happen. So today I was up crushing the
upper half of the glacier. I have a fairly clear roof now. Hopefully I
have ended the leaks for awhile.

The real point of that was to say that I was up on the roof almost
finished with my task. It was the kind of day that gave me faith that
there would be no snow. We will discuss further weather I hope for snow
or hope for no snow. Today though, I just felt like there would be no
snow. The sun was not exactly out, but it was bright behind the high
clouds.  There was no wind that I noticed. I never imagined that snow
was near. In one second flat. I noticed the breeze pick up from the west
and the air was full of flakes and the sky darkened seven shades. "So
this is lake effect," I thought, "Very impressive." I was impressed that
it could come up so quickly. I was impressed that though I know what the
weather will so in the summer, at least half a day in advance, I have no
clue in the winter. Apparently one can never know when snow can develop
in one second flat. Another north country lesson.

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As we all know it is February. Raise your hand if you feel like sleeping
a lot. Raise your hand if you feel like dying your hair or chopping it
all off. Raise your hand if you feel trapped in your house, in your job.
Raise your hand if you have the February Blahs. Some call it seasonal
affective disorder. Who knows if we can really call it that, or if that
is pop psychology? Who cares? What matters is we all, from the North
anyway know the feeling. I always cut my hair in February or dye it,
depending on the severity of my blahs.

It was these blahs that I feared greatly this year. My tolerance is
down. Last year I saw not one snow flake. In January there was still 11
hours of day light and it never got colder than one flannel weather. The
year before was terrible. Not only did I have to contend with winter but
I had a broken leg and insurance anxiety. The last time I spent a whole
winter in the North, was 1993-94. I survived that one ok, but as I say
my resistance is down and I was facing February, alone, in the woods,
with even more snow. Frightening, it was.

I'm telling you today that I do not have the February blahs. Ok, I did
try to dye my hair last week. But it didn't take. Maybe that was a sign.
I get out in the snow enough and get enough sun to keep my vitamin D
levels up and my adrenaline flowing. I don't have the blahs, I say.

I have something that may be worse. I love the snow. I can't imagine
living up here and not hoping for feet (of snow (a pile of snow feet
deep, not feet made of snow)) to fall. I don't even mind shoveling when
there is nice white fluffy stuff falling.

I recognized my problem the other day. I walked out of the house and saw
the driveway and though, "The plow man is in a conspiracy against me."
That's when I knew that I had a problem. That's when I knew what it was.

February Paranoia.

It's bad enough that you have to shovel your roof as well as your
driveway up here. It's bad enough that the plow always comes by as soon
has you have finished shoveling. It is bad enough that the snow he plows
in is ten times as heavy as the stuff in the drive way. It is bad enough
that the driveway is starting to feel like a tunnel and the mounds at
the ends are too high to throw more snow onto. The day that got me, can
you imagine what he did? Can you imagine what that plow person did? It
wasn't even snowing. It hadn't snowed in twenty four hours. I walked out
and saw the driveway, and it was the biggest, heaviest pile yet. It was
plowed so fast, the force had cascaded it up the drive a full ten feet.
It hadn't even snowed. I had to move the piles at the end of the drive
before I could move the pile in the drive. That plow person is out to
get me. He knows that I am the only one that doesn't have or hire a
plow, and he gives me extra snow. I think he knows when I will have to
go to Watertown. I think he will plow early those days to be sure and
catch me in. And he will be sure to plow again before I get home to be
sure I have to park my car in the road while I shovel. I wonder who else
is in on it. Maybe the driveway plow contractor. Yeah, that's it. They
won't get me though. I'll shovel until the bitter end.

I hope this passes with March. Who knows what that Lion - Lamb double
whammy will do up here.

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It is good, I suppose, that I have enough to keep my mind off of that,
except on Sunday nights, and snowy mornings while shoveling. In other
news. I am a sworn appointed officer of the Bureau of the Census of the
Department of Commerce of Federal Government of the United States Of
America. I'll take you to the swearing in ceremony.

"Please stand and raise you right hand. Repeat after me. First I should
say that you may omit the words 'so help me god' and you may substitute
the word 'affirm' for the word 'swear' in the following oath....

Damn I could have sworn that was in one of the hand books. They didn't
make us memorize it. I think it is the same oath that the president
takes on every fourth January. There is no doubt in my mind that they all
say 'swear' and 'so help me god'

Anyway this oath is more palatable than the flag pledge. That one is
ridiculous. I just pledged to serve the constitution and defend it
against all enemies foreign and domestic. So you subversives better
watch out what you say around me, at least until my badge expires on
April 7.

I was the only non veteran in the room and they all shared reminiscences
about what bad memories that oath brings back. I'm thinking they said it
their first day of basic training back in the good old days of basic
horrors. I'm told basic is kinder and gentler these days. I will never
know.

Tomorrow is Monday. There is no telling whether it will be just life or
just art or both or some combination. Today it is Sunday.

Mixim